December 2003 – January 2004 Grapevine
FOR ALL
What illnesses do overloaded Christmas trees get?
Tinselitis!
Dear Friends,
A teacher in an infant school was talking to her young class about Christmas. “Can anyone name two of Santa’s reindeer”, she asked.
At once a little boy shot his hand up. “Rudolf and Olive”, he announced.
“Well I’ve heard of Rudolf, but I don’t think there is an Olive”.
“Yes there is”, said the little boy confidently, “it’s in the song” and he proceeded to
sing -
“Rudolf the red nosed reindeer
Had a very shine nose.
And
if you ever saw it,
You
would even say it glowed.
Olive
the other reindeer….”
But it’s not only this little boy who is confused about the details of Christmas. A lot of people are today. And is it any wonder when the real meaning of Christmas is increasingly ignored. I heard of a charity that has consciously banned any religious scenes from its greetings cards this year. And where the shops are full of Chubby images of Santa Claus and snowflakes, there is not a nativity scene to be found.
Of course all of this is only to be expected as it reflects the decreasing influence and importance Christianity has in people’s lives. But I would prefer Christmas to be moved to another date than to see this gradual commercial high jack of one of the most beautiful and important festivals in our year.
Not that I don’t enjoy a mid winter celebration and to receiving presents just like anyone else, because I do (members of my family please note). But not at the price of losing out on the greatest gift of all. The gift of Jesus Christ, Emmanuel (God with us).
This is a gift far too important to be lost among the scenes of Robins on Christmas cards and images of Santa Claus.
It may be Xmas, but it certainly isn’t Christmas.
Let’s put Jesus back where he belongs, at the centre of our celebrations this year. And on behalf of my family and myself, may you have a very merry CHRISTMAS and a happy New Year.
Where do snowmen put their web pages?
On the winternet
Church Flowers
Thanks to all members who donate flowers for December and January.
The flower rota will be put up at the end of December. Please put your name on the list.
Ron
Prayers
Bert who will be spending his Christmas in a nursing home, being still very poorly.
Ivy Blogg, also ill. Margaret, being well cared for by the wonderful Yorktey House staff. Young Emily Powell, still in hospital and mourning her mother, and her six-year old brother Jack and stepfather. The parents of the Soham girls with their courtroom ordeal. Also for all old or lonely people spending Christmas alone - and all those with troubles.
The collection for the Methodist Homes was £14. Thanks to all who gave.
After six years doing a wonderful job, Vat has to give up as secretary and treasurer. On behalf of everyone, “Thank You for all you have done”. Ray Clay has taken over as secretary and Ron Love as treasurer.
Again this year, it would be nice if everyone gave a donation to the bemeiza House children’s hospice instead of giving Christmas cards. I will give everyone an envelope nearer the time.
Ron
What beats his chest and
swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake? Tarzipan!
Can I have a broken drum for
Christmas?
The best thing you could
have asked
for. You can’t beat it!
bear Father Christmas, could you please send me a musical
instrument. Thank you, Yours,
A. Fisherman Father Christmas: That’s easy, we’ll send him a cast-a-net.
Man: That train set looks
fantastic. I’ll take one. Assistant: I’m sure your son will love it, Sir!
Man: (sighs) Oh, yes I suppose he would. You’d better give me two, then.
‘Father Christmas has two reindeer. He calls one
Edward and the other one Edward! I bet you can’t tell me why he does that!’ ‘Oh, yes I can.’
The elf said. ‘Because two ‘Eds are better than one, of
course!’
What did the big candle
say to the little candle?
I’m going out tonight!
What do Eskimos use to
hold their homes together?
Ig-”glue”!
What do elves sing to
Santa?
Freeze a Jolly Good
Fellow!
Walk for the Homeless
Hazel and Eddie
would like to thank all who sponsored them on the walk for the Homeless in
October. They raised £141.92 between them.
What
do snowmen do in cold weather?
Sit
round a candle.
What
do they do in very cold weather?
Light
it!!
WHAT IS CHRISTMAS ABOUT?
Can you see beyond the tinsel and fairy lights?
Can you see beyond the cost and not the fight?
Can you see more then the wreath upon the door?
Can you see more the brightly lit Santa’s galore?
Is Christmas about cost and what we have lost?
Is it about the light dusting of frost?
Is Christmas about food and a midwinter celebration?
Is it not about our Saviours creation?
Is it the food and games that make it special? Is it the decorations and brightly coloured wrapping paper?
Is it the Christmas cake and Christmas pudding?
No to see what for,
We must look beyond the stable door.
Please pray for those of our church who are
unwell. For our elderly friends who are finding it increasingly difficult to
get to church.
For Cath Wells
who has been unwell with bronchitis Ron Thomas not eating again and losing too
much weigh For Bob Wood back from having his eye operation For
For Cherry Buckhannon our new Pastoral
Secretary that God will be with her in the apartment, and for Eileen Lowery who
has retired from the post we give thanks for all the work she has done.
Let us all pray, as we draw near to
Christmas, a family time for all those who will be alone, for world peace, and
for all in need the whole world over.
That Gods Love and Peace will fill his
troubled world as we celebrate the birthday of Jesus Christ the Son of God this
Christmas time and always.
International Needs
– Presents
“live & connected"
by
Graham
Hepburn and Akin Mullery Thursday 4~’ December, 8pm
in
The Main Hall
An evening of
Wit, Wisdom, Christian
Witness and Live Music
Information
020 8688 3939
inuk@inter-nationalneeds.com
A
Course for Elders and those considering a call to Eldership (incorporating
Local Leadership)
5 Saturdays from 17TH January
1Oam to 3.3Opm (with lunch)
Scriptural roots,
Ecumenical aspects, pastoral roles, teamwork, effective communication, the
wider church, the community and youth and children’s
work - contact Des Colechin
Borrowed Joy
Let’s borrow from our
memories
When times ore sad &
trying
Let’s find a little laughter
When we’re very near to
crying
Secure in loving thought
Of happy friends arid
distant places
Knowing future days will
hold
Good times and merry
faces
Thursday 11th
December
Human Rights bay
www.oneworld.org/una_uk
Festival of Hope 2004
As well as
the United Margate Churches Service, the Festival Finale (probably now to be in
one of the parks) and the ‘On the Move’ barbecue event, Union Church
is considering a day of board games - Scrabble, ludo, Rummikub etc followed by taking such games into various
homes where the residents have a common room. It is also planned to join
in the Monston Flower Festival. Other thoughts are a barn
dance and youth and young children’s events (so that parents can get
away to enjoy other activities!).
Any volunteers?
Any other ideas?
Let’s really serve the local
community for at least this week!!
What did the big cracker say to
the little cracker?
My pop is
bigger than yours!
Did Rudolph go to a
regular school? No, he Wa.. .s elf-taught!
How long should a reindeer’s legs
be?
Just long enough to reach the
ground
How does Rudolph know when Christmas
is coming?
He looks
at his calen-”deer”!
What did
Adam say on the day before Christmas? It’s Christmas, Eve
What do
you have in December that you don’t have in any other month ?
The letter
“D”
Why does
Father Christmas go down the chimney? Because it soots
him !
How many
chimneys does Father Christmas go down? Stacks I
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Dear Father Christmas, this Christmas
could you please send me a yellow door.
Yours, Sherlock Holmes
Watson: So why do you want a yellow door,
Holmes?
Holmes: Lemon-entry my dear Watson.
If there were 1.1 elves,
and another one came along, what would he be?
The twelf
A Christmas thought: STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backward.
What comes at the end of
Christmas Day? The letter “Y”!
What do monkeys sing at
Christmas? Jungle Bells, Jungle bells..
How do you describe a
rich elf? Welfy
And
as the reindeer say before they tell you jokes ....These jokes will sleigh you!
How do you make a slow
reindeer fast? Don’t feed it!
Dear Father Christmas,
could you please send me some Crocodile shoes!. Father
Christmas: Can’t do that. He hasn’t said what size his crocodile takes!
For All
Sewing Together
Mariyama and her dad struggled with the
heavy burden along the dust covered, pot-holed and unsurfaced
road for three miles to their village.
Unlike many, she was able to start
school at 7, but it meant a three mile walk to the only school in the
area. She was one of the few Gambian children to receive further education
beyond the age of 13 when compulsory education finishes and has completed three
years vocational training (including a course in needlework and designing
clothes). In common with many Gambians she has a flair
for art and crafts but can now use both talent and learnt skills to make and
sell clothes to help the family income. There is a scarcity in
Mariyama had passed an examination to gain
her additional education but the cost could never had
been met by her parents -
expenses were covered
by local missionaries and their agents with help from Edaid.
Her father scratches a living on a
farm in rural
World-wide economy is affecting
Missionary groups and organisations
such as Edaid (Education Aid for
Edaid is a group from various catholic
churches in
By now you may have gathered that Mariyarna and her father were struggling with a sewing
machine - possibly one of the 18 or so
collected by responses from Union Church. These were gratefully received
through Edaid as shown by
beaming smiles on the 18 faces in
An Edaid
video on
Douglas and Moira Bush
Union Church
Fair-trade
The United
Reformed Church is committed to supporting and encouraging the use of
Fair-trade products in all our churches and to establish Fair-trade churches,
towns, cities, and Synods. Relevant Commitment for
Life information can be got from 81,
To be a
Fair-trade Church, a church agrees I) to use Fair-trade tea and coffee for all
its meetings ii)
to move
towards using other Fair-trade products (eg sugar,
biscuits, fruit and iii) to promote Fairtrade Fortnight and other activities
whenever possible.
“Speak
zip for people who cannot speak for themselves. Protect the rights of all who
are helpless. 5peok for them and be a righteous judge. Protect the rights of the poor and needy” Proverbs 3 1:8-9
The URC
Commitment for Life website has detail on international trade issues and the
Trade Justice Movement.
Members are encouraged to write to their MP, The Secretary of State for Trade and Industry, The Secretary of State for International Development, The Chancellor of the Exchequer and the Minister for Trade to urge the government to
i) renew efforts to achieve the Millennium development Goals in full and on time
ii) renew its commitment to debt
relief
iii) note the anger of developing
countries at being required to open their markets to subsidised
produce from rich countries and other unfair competition.
What do vampires put on their turkey at Christmas/
Grave-y!
Whats the best thing to put into a Christmas cake?
Your teeth !
My bear Friends
Finally, I have stopped
long enough to send you greetings from far-flung Queenborough.
Everything has been so hectic the past weeks. I have felt like a logger being
carried downstream with not a lot of control over anything. However, I am now
staying with my son in Queenborough for the next three weeks. I cannot in all
honesty say it is a beautiful place but it is different. I believe the river
and the sea merge somewhere here. It is not warm but it is good to see children and young folk
well wrapped up and walking everywhere. This is what I call ‘doing” a place. We live almost
on the shore, so it is
nothing to
see boats being pushed along the road on wheels - going for repair I would guess.
We went in a car along one road the other day
and it had large signs saying “BEWARE
OF THE WILDLIFEM and
indeed there was plenty of it: grouse,
geese, hare etc. I just loved it.
The roads are certainly not the best
I have been in on my buggy but nonetheless I am sure I will very soon get to
know where the best spots are for crossing the roads. The buggy flags encourage people to talk to me, so I
am really enjoying the restful break before I start again making the move to
Now for my main reason for writing:
to thank you one and all for your cards wishing me every
happiness in my new home. Your messages were so caring and loving. They
meant so much to me - even the one I had to run round in
circles to read (see Pam). And what can I say about my beautiful gifts. My
aerial pictures of
Sadly, I have not found a
URC or Methodist church near at hand, yet there is a Church of England right
next door whose clock chimes on the hour every hour - day and night. So it is not favorite at the moment.
I shall be thinking of
you on bazaar day. I do hope you have a really good day. It takes a lot of
getting used to after 37 years not to be part of it.
Every blessing to you all
Emily Baynes
Can I have a wombat for
Christmas?
What would you do with a wombat?
Play wom,
of course!!
Noah’s Ark Bazaar
THANK YOU to everyone who
made our Bazaar such a happy and successful day. It was good to have so many
visitors with us and in particular Jean and Martin Quick sharing the day with
us on their first visit to Union Church.
So many people were
involved from the preparation stage through to the end that I would fill the
whole magazine by naming them all. Please accept this as my personal thanks to you all for
your hard work before and on the day....and of course for the many prayerful
thoughts for the success of our Bazaar.
The total at the time of submitting this to the Editor is £1,127.55 - but as we all know, .any-thing printed is out of date by the time it is read. There are still a few amounts expected....so with a few prayers we may get a little closer to my optimistic figure of £2,000.
Anita Rourk
Our annual Bazaar proved
to be a very successful and happy event. Everyone entered into the spirit of
the occasion. The stalls represented an animal from the
Joan Corbey
After our Harvest weekend, I
went to deliver a parcel to
I then went on to visit Irene
Harris. She was so thrilled and could not believe that we remembered her enough
to send a harvest gift.
Later, I met Margery Moon
and she said how good it was to receive the harvest box from us.
In each case, I don’t
think it was necessarily the harvest gift but the fact that we
cared enough to think of them and bothered to visit them even though none of
them are able to come to church now.
Sylvia Lamb
What did the Eskimos sing when they
got their Christmas dinner?
“Whale meat again, don’t know where,
don’t know when” !
We would like to thank
all family and friends for their best wishes for us in our new home. It has
been a most harrowing and upsetting time for us over the past months. As for
myself, I don’t know what I would have done without the love and support given
to us by the church family. So at this time of the year, I would like to wish
you all "Glad Tidings of Great Joy”. May God bless you all and the
love of Jesus Christ be with us all. Blessed be love.
Debbie Baynes
and Family
Debbie and Freddie
wish you all
A Very Merry Christmas
and
A Happy New Year
Jeff and I would to thank
everyone for their prayers, get-well cards and the flowers. The new knee will
take time to get used to but he is persevering. Thank You.
Betty Coleman
Thank you very much to Moira and Douglas
Bush who took port in the Friends of East Kent Churches Sponsored Cycle Ride
raising the sum of £130 (of which half will be returned to our church). Well
done both of you.
To all our friends at Union Church
We are looking forward to our first
Christmas here in New Zealand, it certainly won’t be what we are used to,
instead there will be lovely weather, trips to the beach, and an alternative menu
(though I will introduce some traditional dishes into it!). The seven of us
will spend Christmas Eve and Christmas bay together, then
we are off down to
So there is lots
to look forward to. However, we shall miss our family in
We hope you all have an enjoyable
Christmas, we shall be thinking of you.
Much love and may
God bless you all.
Philippa, Gary, Chelsea, Charlie, Nick, Tina and
Jon Lawn
Controlling the Weapons Trade to Save Lives
The world
is awash with weapons — there are 639 Million small arms in the world or one for
every ten people.
Half a
million people die as a result of armed violence every year, that is one every
minute and equivalent to the population of a city the size of
In addition
to this massive toll in lost lives, the weapons trade is a barrier to countries
escaping from poverty. One in three countries spend
more on their military than they do on health care services.
With the
value of global authorised arms exports estimated at $23 billion per year, the
Oxfam,
Amnesty International and International Action on Small Arms have recently
launched a joint campaign calling for an international arms trade treaty to
bring the supply and use of conventional weapons under tight regulation.
To bring
pressure to bear on the governments who would have to agree such a treaty, the
campaign aims to use its internet site to build a “Million Faces’ petition.
If you log
on to www.controlarms.org, you can be part of the petition by either
uploading a photo of yourself, selecting a picture to represent you from an
on-line gallery or drawing a computer picture of yourself.
Without
internationally agreed action, it is unlikely the death and misery resulting
from the global weapons trade will be curbed and we can support that call to
“Control Arms”.
Social
Responsibility Secretary 24